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  3. I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

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  • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

    What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

    I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

    SashinS This user is from outside of this forum
    SashinS This user is from outside of this forum
    Sashin
    wrote last edited by
    #25

    @vkc How would you feel about sharing the really bad stuff too but with clear content warnings?

    Veronica ExplainsV 1 Reply Last reply
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    • SashinS Sashin

      @vkc How would you feel about sharing the really bad stuff too but with clear content warnings?

      Veronica ExplainsV This user is from outside of this forum
      Veronica ExplainsV This user is from outside of this forum
      Veronica Explains
      wrote last edited by
      #26

      @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

      SashinS BredrollB 2 Replies Last reply
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      • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

        @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

        SashinS This user is from outside of this forum
        SashinS This user is from outside of this forum
        Sashin
        wrote last edited by
        #27

        @vkc I'm sorry you have to go through that.

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

          What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

          I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

          shadowwwindS This user is from outside of this forum
          shadowwwindS This user is from outside of this forum
          shadowwwind
          wrote last edited by
          #28

          @vkc hey, thank you for posting here, I rediscovered your channel because of your Mastodon posts.

          For me the moderation is a big reason to be on a managed instance

          Question I had but reading your other comments suggests the answer ;D :
          One thing I wondered, did your mastodon experience change when you moved from a moderated instance to your own?

          dpflugD 1 Reply Last reply
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          • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

            @McNeely I think it's unique to decentralization. If your instance blocked a baddie before they post in my replies, you don't see it and I do. In centralized social media, a mass of reports is enough to ban an account and get their posts mass-deleted. That just can't happen here.

            Void of Tranquillity 🔞V This user is from outside of this forum
            Void of Tranquillity 🔞V This user is from outside of this forum
            Void of Tranquillity 🔞
            wrote last edited by
            #29

            @vkc @McNeely 100% accurate. I run a micro-instance that's likely to upset people and attract bother, and I have to set aside time to expose myself to some genuinely grotesque and upsetting stuff in order to keep on top of the servers I need to block, and we get far fewer eyeballs and interaction on us than Victoria.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

              What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

              I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

              JéjéM This user is from outside of this forum
              JéjéM This user is from outside of this forum
              Jéjé
              wrote last edited by
              #30

              @vkc sorry about all that crap. Some people are using their anonymity to reveal their real nature that can be awful. And because they may read you every day, they think they know you intimately so they suppose they're allowed to tell you anything they want. That's difficult to ignore these haters when you're their target. I hope you'll be able to get over it.

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              • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                C SC This user is from outside of this forum
                C SC This user is from outside of this forum
                C S
                wrote last edited by
                #31

                @vkc I'm sorry about how Fedi is treating you. I sometimes forget that my own Fedi bubble is benign not because Fedi as a whole is benign, but because I put in the effort to aggressively block any content I don't like, *and* I don't have a visible enough presence that would encourage the undesirables to circumvent my block list.

                Social media can be garbage, and if you do need a break I will be sad because I enjoy your content, but please do put your own mental health first if you need to.

                Best wishes...

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                  I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                  It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                  I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                  Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                  DexT This user is from outside of this forum
                  DexT This user is from outside of this forum
                  Dex
                  wrote last edited by
                  #32

                  @vkc Thanks for speaking openly about this, Veronica. I cannot fully understand your situation, but I can relate to being harassed in an invisible way and I wouldn't wish that on anyone else. I wouldn't want to see you leave Fedi, but I also wouldn't blame you if you did.

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                    When people say "Veronica loves the Fediverse", they remove my agency from this place. I'm a character. They're the narrator. I don't like that.

                    I think for a lot of folks, Fedi is sweet. It's quiet. It's slow. But for many, many, many of us, it's this slow-rolling insanity machine where you see the WORST THINGS and nobody else does.

                    And to be frank and clear, I'm just talking about things from my white US perspective. I don't even get the worst of it, and I recognize that.

                    dlaroeD This user is from outside of this forum
                    dlaroeD This user is from outside of this forum
                    dlaroe
                    wrote last edited by
                    #33

                    @vkc

                    You are surely frank and clear.

                    You sharing stuff like this is really valuable to me as a white, cisgendered, heterosexual, male, with a low volume account. My privileges stack in such a way that I see none of the bad actor interactions you do.

                    Thank you for sharing what those who aren't even the worst of us in the Fediverse are doing so we all can know at least that much.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                      I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                      It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                      I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                      Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                      ClassWarioC This user is from outside of this forum
                      ClassWarioC This user is from outside of this forum
                      ClassWario
                      wrote last edited by
                      #34

                      @vkc This platform needs more editing (and anger) aimed at it. This is my third account because I get frustrated at what it is (then come back here for what it should be).

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                        @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

                        BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
                        BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
                        Bredroll
                        wrote last edited by
                        #35

                        @vkc @sashin i wonder if fedi has a community block list feature

                        Ner 🕯️N 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
                          BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
                          Bredroll
                          wrote last edited by
                          #36

                          @Shadow_Glider @vkc @McNeely i do wonder if its more costly to manage federated or honepot blocking than the bad actors just creating more accounts

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                            What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

                            I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

                            Osma A 🇫🇮🇺🇦O This user is from outside of this forum
                            Osma A 🇫🇮🇺🇦O This user is from outside of this forum
                            Osma A 🇫🇮🇺🇦
                            wrote last edited by
                            #37

                            Thanks for being here, and thanks for speaking out. This won't ever get better without first acknowledging it's not good.
                            @vkc

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                              @McNeely I think it's unique to decentralization. If your instance blocked a baddie before they post in my replies, you don't see it and I do. In centralized social media, a mass of reports is enough to ban an account and get their posts mass-deleted. That just can't happen here.

                              FurbyF This user is from outside of this forum
                              FurbyF This user is from outside of this forum
                              Furby
                              wrote last edited by
                              #38

                              @vkc @McNeely This highlights a need for more co-ordinated efforts like The Bad Space, but less manual. @Gargron How are those imported ban lists coming along?

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                HoboH This user is from outside of this forum
                                HoboH This user is from outside of this forum
                                Hobo
                                wrote last edited by
                                #39

                                @vkc I really appreciate your work here (as well as on YouTube), and I am glad that people like you contribute the Fediverse. Recently in German Mastodon another woman issued hate speech she is receiving on a regular basis. It‘s a shame, and it‘s simply against everything the Fediverse was built for. Please feel my/our support!

                                PS: And I apologize for my remark earlier today, which I made while not having understood well the things you were talking about.

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                  I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                  It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                  I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                  Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                  ntheltN This user is from outside of this forum
                                  ntheltN This user is from outside of this forum
                                  nthelt
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #40

                                  @vkc I appreciate you. You're welcome here.

                                  I feel that moderation tools on Fedi is lacking. There should be a way for smaller instances to follow the moderation decisions of larger, more well-moderated instances. Maybe in the form of a community blocked users and instances list that updates in real time, and instances can choose to follow that 100%, or apply whitelists and blacklists to it.

                                  Maybe multiple block lists, like we do with ad blocking.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                    I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                    It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                    I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                    Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                    scunneen (he/him) 🚋S This user is from outside of this forum
                                    scunneen (he/him) 🚋S This user is from outside of this forum
                                    scunneen (he/him) 🚋
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #41

                                    @vkc Do you think that things would be better if fedi worked more like a network of blogs and stored comments on the server of the person who made the original post? Then deciding which comments people see is the responsibility of the original post's server, and everyone can see the same comment list. This also would allow posters to delete other peoples' comments on their posts, and to prevent people who they have blocked from commenting.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • BredrollB Bredroll

                                      @vkc @sashin i wonder if fedi has a community block list feature

                                      Ner 🕯️N This user is from outside of this forum
                                      Ner 🕯️N This user is from outside of this forum
                                      Ner 🕯️
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #42

                                      @Bredroll @vkc @sashin
                                      So black people tried / managed to create some because they get the shit fast and violent like really violent. I mean other people of color too but black people , especially black queers and black women spearheaded that.

                                      They got harassed many many times over this.
                                      Eg the bad place, but even the hashtag fediblock exists because they had to fight back, ...
                                      Some people still continue to maintain some.
                                      Some people left over that.
                                      Some people left and came back.

                                      AND the devs of most fediverse software actively préfèred working on other stuff than the features they asked for for their safety.
                                      ( Trying to remember the names I can think of Ro / at aroh and a Caribbean MarciaX I think who really led 🤔 not sure , seyrin and oliphant also who proposed stuff there was many times this discussion, I think )

                                      And yes part of it is that choosing an instance is choosing a moderation, but also the fact that instances safe for black people are harassed to the point of closing ( happened I saw it happen twice probably happened more ) , the fact that people are saying 'you should be fine with this couple of instances who care like it's not building fucking virtual ghettos to harass people out everywhere except there but also victim blaming' or plenty of other stuff. There needs to be a culture shift to not let the mysoginy , general racism, antiblackness and very specifically mysoginoir fly, there needs to be campaigns for actually paying the instances that do good moderation.

                                      Because until people start acting generally like 'you see something you says something' instead of coddling piece of shits abusers. And until thats the culture going to continue. And actively looking for the abuse sometimes to protect their neighbors on those internet streets. It's going to continue.

                                      Also 2 Pb : people recreating accounts ( how many times have I see a post on fediblock 'hey you remember this harasser, well they created another account with one letter changed into a number now that everyone has blocked them) - don't really know how to solve this one, when you block someone they can still see your public posts because of how the federation works and how it's open to the whole internet. That one I think there should be something developed in between public / shadowed public posts and people who follow you posts because that enables stalkers and harassers big time. And to fix this problem has been asked for 10 years by now.

                                      Did I mention black people have been shouting into the void for the last 10 years from what I gathered ( I am here since 2022 but fediblock happened 2016 or 2017 because of harassment campaigns) ?

                                      BredrollB 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                        I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                        It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                        I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                        Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                        SomeVeganCheeseIsOkS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        SomeVeganCheeseIsOkS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        SomeVeganCheeseIsOk
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #43

                                        @vkc yeah there's a lot of fringe folks here. Both in the good sense and the bad sense. The Internet is a public space, and that means we get to experience all the stuff that comes with that.

                                        I am mostly grateful even for the weird ugly sad parts, because that's how you know it's real.

                                        dpflugD 1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                          I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                          It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                          I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                          Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                          Greg BellF This user is from outside of this forum
                                          Greg BellF This user is from outside of this forum
                                          Greg Bell
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #44

                                          @vkc ug; that same quirk that makes every reply guy not realize their thing has been said already, makes everyone else not see the abusive replies, so we can't help shout them down, so your replies become a hostile place for you, not them .

                                          This is the utter doom for big accounts using fedi, at least ones who have any interest in interacting rather than just megaphoning.

                                          I hope there's some possible design solution because we need this place, but like a better analog

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