@VeeRat I am glad you found it helpful, or at least reflecting some of what you are going through.Hopefully you have someone to mirror as well. A therapist, or someone.Everyone finds their own way.I think a stable mirror from another person is necessary.For a long time, what I wrote in private was my mirror, but it was not enough for me.It seems weird maybe, but I hope you enjoy the journey as much as the destination. The journey is the destination, imho.