Hey there @schmalzkringel, thanks for the follow request!
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@alice @schmalzkringel I think dogs should be replaced with small dromaeosaurus like velociraptor. Roughly the same size, fast, agile and they probably got fluffy feathers
Cats on the other hand should be replaced with Geckos. I mean.. have you ever looked at one of those small critters? They're smol, cute and look like they're smiling. And they can hunt down all mosquitos who enter ones place
@enbypirate I love geckos so much! They're my favorite part of visiting Hawaii.
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@alice as a Canadian, I agree.
@mayintoronto @alice @roknrol @schmalzkringel There's a reason we call them Cobra Chickens.
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@mayintoronto @alice @roknrol @schmalzkringel There's a reason we call them Cobra Chickens.
@mayintoronto @alice @roknrol @schmalzkringel During nesting season, they're such assholes. If they come at you, just gotta give them the ol' beakflip.
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@mayintoronto @alice @roknrol @schmalzkringel During nesting season, they're such assholes. If they come at you, just gotta give them the ol' beakflip.
@grim_elsewhere a goose bit my bare thigh once because I wouldn't give it a cracker. I slapped it.
We both sat for a moment, silently appalled at each other's actions.
Then we both swore at each other from a safe distance until we decided to part ways.
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@grim_elsewhere a goose bit my bare thigh once because I wouldn't give it a cracker. I slapped it.
We both sat for a moment, silently appalled at each other's actions.
Then we both swore at each other from a safe distance until we decided to part ways.
@alice So rude. But you do have ridiculously bitable thighs. Still, I would ask first. What kind of cracker was it?
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@grim_elsewhere a goose bit my bare thigh once because I wouldn't give it a cracker. I slapped it.
We both sat for a moment, silently appalled at each other's actions.
Then we both swore at each other from a safe distance until we decided to part ways.
@alice @grim_elsewhere @mayintoronto @roknrol @schmalzkringel an English swan once bit my moms ass for the same reason. Those birds are mixture of anger, beauty, courage and the power to back it up
When I hung around with some punks at our meeting point next to the river, a pair of swans nested there. On one evening one of the two swans walked right towards us and we shit our pants, because big bad angry bird. And he sat right next to us and did.. Nothing. Except hissing at every person walking nearby.
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@alice @grim_elsewhere @mayintoronto @roknrol @schmalzkringel an English swan once bit my moms ass for the same reason. Those birds are mixture of anger, beauty, courage and the power to back it up
When I hung around with some punks at our meeting point next to the river, a pair of swans nested there. On one evening one of the two swans walked right towards us and we shit our pants, because big bad angry bird. And he sat right next to us and did.. Nothing. Except hissing at every person walking nearby.
@enbypirate You can't give any ground to them. Dropkick that football with legs. /s
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@enbypirate You can't give any ground to them. Dropkick that football with legs. /s
@grim_elsewhere @alice @mayintoronto @roknrol @schmalzkringel
Tbf I would fear for my life if a swan got really pissed at me -
Hey there @schmalzkringel, thanks for the follow request! Unfortunately there's not enough vibe on your profile to check, so...
If you could swap the world's cats and dogs with two other things, and folx would continue as though their lives and pets had always been that way, what would you choose?
I really want to answer with something like "tiny fainting goats & giant rubber chickens" just for the laughs I'd get out of it.
@alice @schmalzkringel In Australia, one occasionally hears suggestions about domesticating a native species, such as the quoll, and replacing cats (an invasive predator) with them, though it seems to be impractical on any reasonable timeframe
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@alice as a Canadian, I agree.
@mayintoronto @alice @roknrol @schmalzkringel there's a reason Canadians are considered the nicest human beings on earth : when your only other point of comparison are these avian brutes, it's hard to look bad.
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@mayintoronto @alice @roknrol @schmalzkringel there's a reason Canadians are considered the nicest human beings on earth : when your only other point of comparison are these avian brutes, it's hard to look bad.
@mayintoronto @alice @roknrol @schmalzkringel that or there was a finite amount of meanness to distribute across the country, and the geese got 90% of it.
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@enbypirate Very large ducks - with attitude. @grim_elsewhere @alice @mayintoronto @roknrol
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Hey there @schmalzkringel, thanks for the follow request! Unfortunately there's not enough vibe on your profile to check, so...
If you could swap the world's cats and dogs with two other things, and folx would continue as though their lives and pets had always been that way, what would you choose?
I really want to answer with something like "tiny fainting goats & giant rubber chickens" just for the laughs I'd get out of it.
@alice @schmalzkringel I'd replace cats with owls; I'm not sure anyone would notice. And then replace dogs with small bears.
I mean, if you look at my handle, my answer kinda becomes obvious.
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Hey there @schmalzkringel, thanks for the follow request! Unfortunately there's not enough vibe on your profile to check, so...
If you could swap the world's cats and dogs with two other things, and folx would continue as though their lives and pets had always been that way, what would you choose?
I really want to answer with something like "tiny fainting goats & giant rubber chickens" just for the laughs I'd get out of it.
I've seen someone post the swaparoo of cats with dogs so I'll ponder this.
Aha.
I'd swap cats with chinchilla's. If you ever had any you will know why (hint; nocturnal noisy monsters of fluff)
I'd swap dogs with fennec foxes (just because they look so cute) -
Hey there @schmalzkringel, thanks for the follow request! Unfortunately there's not enough vibe on your profile to check, so...
If you could swap the world's cats and dogs with two other things, and folx would continue as though their lives and pets had always been that way, what would you choose?
I really want to answer with something like "tiny fainting goats & giant rubber chickens" just for the laughs I'd get out of it.
@alice @schmalzkringel Replace cats with red pandas; replace red pandas with dogs; replace dolphins with cats; and replace dogs with dolphins.
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Hey there @schmalzkringel, thanks for the follow request! Unfortunately there's not enough vibe on your profile to check, so...
If you could swap the world's cats and dogs with two other things, and folx would continue as though their lives and pets had always been that way, what would you choose?
I really want to answer with something like "tiny fainting goats & giant rubber chickens" just for the laughs I'd get out of it.
@alice @schmalzkringel I’d never replace cats. But I would replace dogs formele cats
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@alice @schmalzkringel Replace cats with red pandas; replace red pandas with dogs; replace dolphins with cats; and replace dogs with dolphins.
@flipper username checks out
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@flipper username checks out
@alice @schmalzkringel you do realize that dolphins are massive jerks, don't you?... Ah, now I get it.
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@alice @schmalzkringel you do realize that dolphins are massive jerks, don't you?... Ah, now I get it.
@flipper I didn't know that 🫤That's too bad, I like dolphins (though nothing beats a good cuttlefish).
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Hey there @schmalzkringel, thanks for the follow request! Unfortunately there's not enough vibe on your profile to check, so...
If you could swap the world's cats and dogs with two other things, and folx would continue as though their lives and pets had always been that way, what would you choose?
I really want to answer with something like "tiny fainting goats & giant rubber chickens" just for the laughs I'd get out of it.
@alice @schmalzkringel I don't think you should swap out cats, because cats are awesome.
But I would swap all dogs with foxes.
Well, OK, for a while lets have rats instead of cats.
Or maybe ferrets. Oh yes, ferrets would be cool.
Or, for the lulz, let's go with Armadillos and Raccoons.
![Aria.DNE [grim]](https://cdn2.miau.pub/accounts/avatars/113/931/662/325/016/821/original/0a6006691d1e9076.jpg "Aria.DNE [grim]"){kind=avatar}
